Leeds banter 36656

 

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23 May 2017 13:38:43
ok lads here is my current favorite. three lads walking down the road when the find a lamp, they rub the lamp and a genie comes out and promisies to grant them three wishes. the first man says i wish for a million pounds. boom it is done. He looks into bank acoount and sure enough there is 1m the second says I wanted to be the richest man on the planet. boom it is done ans sure enough he was the third says I want my left arm to rotate anti clockwise for the rest of my life. boom his left arm starts spinning anti clockwise 2nd wish says the genie 1st man say i want to be married to the worlds most beautiful woman. boom this stunner appears and starts kissing the man 2nd says I want to be charming and irristable to all woman. boom and woman start swooning around the fella right says the 3rd man, i want my right arm to spin clockwise for the rest of my life. boom and the arm starts spinning final wish demands the genie 1st man. i never want to feel 27 again and never age until the day i die. boom he's grey hair goes as does the bad knees and receeding gums 2nd man, i don't mind getting old but i never want an ailment or illness for the rest of the my life not even a headache. boom right says the final man thinking. I want my head to bob backwards and forwards for as long as i live. boom and the mans head starts bobing back and forth the men go their sperate ways and meet up 30 years later 1st man boast. I am very rich, i invested well, i have a beuatiful wife and don't feel a day over 27 well says the second man cockily . i have invest well, i have stopped 3rd world hunger, found a cure for cancer and still had enough in the bank to be super rich. i have had 1000's of beautiful woman as lovers and never had so much as ear ache then the third man enters arms flaining all over the place, head bobbing back and forth uncontroably. he looks at the two men and says. here lads I think I ****ed up

{Ed007's Note - That's awful mate, truly awful (facepalm)

Agree2 Disagree0

23 May 2017 15:05:09
Well the prize for the longest totally unfunny joke goes to .

23 May 2017 15:19:18
A lesbian goes to the doctors for a smear test. The Doctor says "That's the cleanest vagina I've ever seen"! The lesbian says "Thanks, I have a woman in twice a week. "! . :)

23 May 2017 17:07:18
Better. Mind you, BW set a very low bar

23 May 2017 17:09:23
What do you call a man with no shins. Tony

23 May 2017 18:20:11
hurt speedy it is better tha way i tell it, all my mates agree its a great joke, but then my mates do like me

23 May 2017 20:32:40
Bermo that's like the jokes 5 years tell, the ones that make no sense!

23 May 2017 20:34:23
Bermo just like one a kid told me once
Knock, knowck
Who's there? Superman
Superman who? He likes eggs! I mean seriously man! Are the sleepless nights finally taking hold

24 May 2017 07:45:08
I thought it hilarious bw. Really funny.







 

 

 
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